Laura is our resident ray of sunshine. She’s a new London dweller, chief of romanticising literally everything, and will definitely ask you all what your love language is at some stage. We love her to death and can’t wait to have her therapeutic wisdom in here whenever we can!
Hi again!!! firstly, thank you soooo much for your advice & lovely emails 😭❤️ I feel like a reverse agony aunt, crowdsourcing my moving qualms, and got v emotional (a common occurrence atm) reading how many of you have experienced similar / and that it’s so normal for things to feel totally chaotic so thank you!! Also can’t believe how many of the SYSCA whānau are London-based - we should definitely have a knitting night or something?? (ps Erica - good luck with your TX move this week!)
A topline moving update - still zero hot showers (day 30 and counting 🙃), zero coffee shop banter, but I DID bond with the shop owner underneath our flat about the lack of gas!!! I also had a glorious trip to the english seaside and honestly came back in SUCH a better headspace. I used to go on road trips with two of my besties along the coast in the North Island where we would surf (badly), eat fish burgers with cheap wine and slowly make our way through the 36 questions that lead to love
(if you haven’t you MUST). We would tumble out of the car with our boards, all sweaty and grumpy from the work week, drag ourselves into the ocean and get thrown around for an hour or so, emerging flushed and unrecognisably mellow. My friend Tess used to call it mental health salt and I’m 100% here for it 🏄🏼♀️ In fact I wrote a piece for VICE a several years ago about a study on veterans with PTSD that found introducing surfing across trials led to a significant improvement in mood, self-esteem and ability to discuss experiences!
But even if it’s not surfing, a walk along the ocean (shoes OFF non negotiable) is one of the surefire ways to get me feeling better about things. It’s something I would actually schedule in for myself most Sunday afternoons a few years ago, when almost like clockwork 4pm brought on the Sunday Scaries. A friend had suggested that to ease the dread around that time, I write out a list of things that I ✨know✨ have a positive effect on my own brain that are accessible to me. Kind of like, if you could plan out a dreamy, gentle afternoon - what would it look like? And at the moment while things are feeling a bit gritty / unfamiliar I’ve found myself returning to that list in my notes app a lot, so I thought I would share 💖 Please send me your suggestions too, I’d love to hear them !!
Here are my cures for the Sunday Scaries:
- Cook something simple - it’s creative, all-consuming and you get something at the end! For me this is almost always a bowl of pasta with a vvv basic tomato sauce. Mashed potato is also always a winner.
- Pat a dog 🥲
- Alt nostril breathing - this activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which releases hormones that can calm your body and decrease feelings of stress. Closing your right nostril and breathing deeply through your left, gently touching your lips (which contain nervous fibres), or my personal fave lol - humming! Your vocal cords are connected to your vagus nerve, which actually stimulates parasympathetic response!!
- Getting in the sun OR in winter turning off my phone / getting under a heavy blanket / picking up a book (needing reccos on these atm!)
- Stretching out just a little bit
- A walk somewhere outside. Ground yourself in Papatūānuku, dig your toes into the sand, breathe some fresh air <3
specific album that I find super settling (we are still early-days in our relationship so not ready for that level of vulnerability juuust yet)
- A hot shower (😭)or bath if you have one!
- Drinking a big glass of water
Lots of love from London!!! xxx